a glimpse of hope

"There's just something about you," he told me. He (M) was a genuinely kind person, and for lack of a better way to put it, a sweet young man. M started out as a harmless acquaintance turned romantic interest, and then turned into a good friend. M had good intentions and no bad qualities to speak of. What was lacking during the romantic interest phase was an overwhelming sense of passion on my part. While M was great (a girl would be lucky to have him), I didn't get the heart-beating-a-mile-a-minute feeling. It was the kind of fondness I feel for my friends. Just friends. For a little while, M had a hard time understanding my point of view. Perhaps it was his inexperience talking or his determination spurring him on. Thinking back, I was probably guilty of being naive too. I wanted to think that our relationship was purely platonic and could stay that way...that he had swept aside his feelings and saw me as just another female friend. The truth didn't fully dawn on me until he uttered those words the last time I saw him, which happened to be days before he left NYC.

There's a reason why I remembered that particular comment at this moment in time. I was just reading my previous post and recalling how V told me it sounded a bit harsh and pessimistic. I didn't mean to dismiss the entire NYC dating scene, but it's the point of view I had that day. Moments ago, I thought back to my "it's complicated" history and found hope in M's words. It's how we should all feel whether we're single or attached. If nothing else, M's statement made me feel special in that moment in time - like I could possibly be the most special person to an individual. It may have been a small gesture from him, but it carried a lot of weight in my opinion. I appreciated his honesty and thoughtfulness. It taught me that even when romantic feelings aren't reciprocated, a connection can be made. A friendship can be forged. And for that, I will feel lucky.